RESPONSIBLE PARENTHOOD

 

Responsible Parenthood is the act or process of effective discharge of duties and obligations of upbringing, rearing of children and wards by parents and guardian. It can also be seen as the “will” and ability of parents to respect and do the needs and aspirations of the family and children. It is the ability of a parent to detect the need, happiness and desire of the children and helping them to become responsible and reasonable children. In other words, it is the tasks on parents to ensure the proper upbringing of their children.

Types or Patterns of responsible parenthood

1.       Authoritative Parenting Style: This is the most desirable parenting style. It allows children to express themselves, while parents still retain authority and control. Authoritative parents have high expectations of their children, but they allow freedom of expression. This type of parents establish authority without the intention of creating fear in the minds of their children, but to help them become useful to themselves and the society.

2.       Authoritarian Parenting Style: Unlike Authoritative Parenting Style, Authoritarian Parents are strict and very demanding: the feeling, opinion of the child doesn't matter when decisions concerning him/her are to be made. Children under authoritarian parenting style are expected to follow rules without questioning, even if they are not cool with the rules. Authoritarian parenting style can be destructive to the children.

3.       Carefree Parenting Style: This is considered to be the least desirable parenting style - tending towards neglect. There is no form of any attachment or affectionate practices between the children and the parents. Perhaps because of busy schedule and work demand, carefree parents rarely stay at home or have time for their children. Carefree Parenting Style is strongly discouraged, and can have destructive effects on the children.

4.       Permissive Parenting Style: Under Permissive Parenting Style, few rules are sometimes set for the children, and the rules are inconsistent when they do exist. Permissive parents are lenient and allow considerable self-regulation. Usually, permissive parenting results from parents who try to compensate for what they themselves lacked as children. Perhaps they were raised by parents who were authoritarian

Roles of Responsible Parents

a.      Providing for the Household: it the responsibility of the parents to provide shelter, food, cloth, medical care, spiritual care, education and social needs for their family.

b.     Caring: Caring is been kind, helpful and showing that you care about other people. So parents should look after and care for their household in providing what their children needs for their health and protections.

c.       Education: every child has the right to be educated. It is therefore the responsibility of parents to provide quality and sustainable education for their children. Education is power, and giving a child a quality education is the greatest gift every parent can give to their children.

d.      Good Home Training: this involve character molding, attitudinal shaping and inculcation  of moral ethical and societal value to the children, home/family as the agent of socialization has to inculcate love, respect, friendliness, hospitality as well as national ethnic of discipline to the children.

e.       Building Positive Concept in Children: It is the role or duty of responsible parents to build self-esteem in their children. Parents should be able to help the children to manage stress, frustration and feel confidence in their future life. If a child is been constantly judge, criticized and blame, the child can grows up and build a negative self-concept.

f.       Teach them proper value: Parents needs to teach their children how to discern rights from wrong. Some parents believe that when children gets older, they will be able to decide for themselves what value to accepts. But this is wrong. Just as young bodies needs proper nurishments to grow up strong and healthy, so young mind and hearts needs instructions.

g.     Love:Our parents should provide us with love throughout our lives, and also teach us to love others. In many ways, our parents can become the model for how we give love in our later lives. It is so important for children to experience a loving relationship from the earliest years of their life, right through to adulthood so that when they become adults they are capable of loving others and receiving love as well.

h.     Safety:Parents ought to ensure that the home is a place of safety for their children. Parenting is important because it shields children from the dangers of the world. Safety and stability are very important for children: having enough to eat, staying warm in the winter, being accompanied by an adult wherever we go and so on are other aspects of staying safe as a child.

i.       Citizenship: Parents can help to form children to be good citizens by teaching them civic virtues such as unselfishness, neatness, truthfulness and willingness to help others. They can also teach children practical things about being a citizen, such as teaching them how to get around the neighborhood and telling them whom to call in the event of an emergency.

Qualities Responsible Parents

1. Be Available And Let Your Children Know: This availability also need to convey to the children. Children need to know that whenever they need to bring something or case to their parents, they will be there and they will not be distracted by work issues.

2. Actively Stick Out Your Children In Conservation: Since parents are available for talk with thier children, at any time, it does not mean that children will always make first move. Parents should be the one to make first movement, this is one of the qualities of a responsible parents, as the truly caring parents for that is part of their responsibility such as asking them how their night went.

3. Equip Yourself With Knowledge And Innovation About Your Children Environment Away From School: Parents have to know about their children and their wards even outside school and their activities. They have to know what things their children are doing. In knowing these things, parents will be able to discuss subjects with them.

4. Be Active Listeners: Four important fact of effective listeners are:

       i.            Making an eye contact

     ii.            Watching body language

  iii.            Being Heard And

   iv.            Waiting for the child to finish talking before saying anything.

5. Respecting The Child’s Feeling: Some parents have an attitude of talking about their children, especially their unpleasant habits, in front of others. Avoid putting a child down like this because it can be a blow to his/her self esteem. Parents with two or more children should also give attention and praises equally to all children and acknowledge their uniqueness.

Importance of Responsible Parenthood

1. Responsible Citizens: The greatest danger associated with irresponsible parenthood is the likelihood of producing a totally disorganised family, and by extension, irresponsible citizen . But responsible parents try to train their children properly in schools. They know the relevant of teaching them a trade or sending them for apprenticeship to acquire skills. This will in turn, create a defined future for the children as the children will not en up as touts, armed robbers, prostitutes etc. But responsible citizens. Those who attained to adulthood will marry because they can handle marital challenges.

2. Reduction In Crime: An educated child is prepared for a job and would subsequently got job. A skilled child in a trade or any kind of job is self-employed, Such children would hardly resort to crime like kidnapping, prostitution, tourism etc. By so doing crime is drastically reduced in the society.

3. Harmonious Co-existence in Home: There is a saying that says “Children are parents of children”. The extent to which children are taken care determine the degree of harmony that will exist in their home when they take up their own homes. Every responsible parent has a duty to sustain and respect his/her matrimonial views by ensuring that his/her marriage does not breakdown.

4. Disciplined Society: Responsible parents produce disciplined society. No one can live a victorious life without discipline. It takes discipline to rise up early in the morning to pray, prepare and go to school, work/office to overcome some temptation or attraction to crime e.t.c. Discipline helps individuals not to waste ones time, talent and resources but to channel them to the actualization of a goal.

5. Obedient Students, Youths and Staff: Responsible parenthood ensure obedient student, youths and staff. Anybody who had good home training will certainly be obedient to constituted authorities. If a student, he/she will respect his teachers and obeys the rules and regulations of his parents. If staff, he/she, obeys the ethic of his office or profession, such obedience guarantees peace and harmony among students and staff also nation at large.